James W.D. Stewart

James W.D. Stewart

Embrace "The Suck"


Home  •  About  •  Blog  •  Blogroll  •  Contact  •  Donate  •  Freelance  •  Gallery  •  In Case of Emergency  •  Résumé  •  Socialize  •  The Suck

 

 

 

Share to:  E-mail  •  Facebook  •  Google+  •  LinkedIn  •  Pinterest  •  Reddit  •  Tumblr  •  Twitter

 

By listening without judgment and negativity, you're giving the soldier/veteran something extremely valuable.  It may seem insignificant — they're pouring out their soul to you, and in doing so, you can have a unique opportunity to help them reclaim what they lost on the battlefield.

Living — surviving — through combat, changes who we were.  We may choose to remain in denial, because if we can pretend to be who we were, then we may not have to face who we've undoubtedly become.

The soldier/veteran's chosen to look into their soul and share with you.  When they delve into this abyss, they experience it for the first time, as well as you.  In combat, we have to compartmentalize all of the horrors of war, due to our inability to process it — to do otherwise, would get us killed.

/blog/2017/05/29/when-a-soldier-confesses-their-sins-of-war-to-you/

https://forces.army/blog/2017/05/29/when-a-soldier-confesses-their-sins-of-war-to-you/

When a Soldier Confesses Their Sins of War to You

Count Words — Reading Time
by James Stewart
Published: 
Updated:    Spelling
Location:  The Donovan, Sudbury, Ontario, Canada
 

 

By listening without judgment and negativity, you're giving the soldier/veteran something extremely valuable.  It may seem insignificant — they're pouring out their soul to you, and in doing so, you can have a unique opportunity to help them reclaim what they lost on the battlefield.

Living — surviving — through combat, changes who we were.  We may choose to remain in denial, because if we can pretend to be who we were, then we may not have to face who we've undoubtedly become.

The soldier/veteran's chosen to look into their soul and share with you.  When they delve into this abyss, they experience it for the first time, as well as you.  In combat, we have to compartmentalize all of the horrors of war, due to our inability to process it — to do otherwise, would get us killed.

By listening and giving them comfort, they can begin to regain that part of the mind that's been ravaged by war.  They aren't necessarily proud of some of the things which they'll share with you.  Don't tell them that you're proud of them, in these moments, for this is a judgment.  Deep down, they know that it's not their fault — this too, is a judgment.

They may blame themselves, the guilt of surviving and/or leaving their battle budd(y/ies) behind, is a crippling cycle of incrimination and damnation.

Tell them soothing things that a mother would tell her daughter/son when he/she comes running home and crying.  There, there…  It's OK, it's OK…  I'm here for you&hrllip;  I love you…  I'm glad that you made it home…  Etc.  Also, encouraging phrases and/or words — go on, I'm listening, OK, uh huh, ya, etc. — can help to encourage the soldier/veteran to go on.  Silence can be an effective communicator of interest in listening.

Remember, this is more about the soldier/veteran.  Let them lead the way, and don't push them into talking, when they wouldn't be comfortable.

I hope that this helps.  If you want to understand why they do the things that they do and/or what may be going on in their mind, browse my blog.  I've put my heart into it, and think that it closely resembles what many combat veterans may feel and/or think themselves.

 
Categories:  Health, Lifestyle, Political, Relationship  
Tags:  MyCAF, Opinionated, Self, The Suck

 
Syndicated to:

 

Share to:  E-mail  •  Facebook  •  Google+  •  LinkedIn  •  Pinterest  •  Reddit  •  Tumblr  •  Twitter

 

 

 

 


DISCLAIMER:  Neither the forces.army domain nor any of its sub-domains are associated with and/or sponsored by any national and/or international government agency or branch of the armed forces in any nation.


Atom  •  Comments  •  Privacy Policy  •  Sitemap  •  Terms and Conditions

 
IndieWebCamp
 
 
Links Monetized by VigLink
 

Creative Commons Licence :: BY-NC-SA James W.D. Stewart by James Stewart is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 4.0 International License.  Based on a work at https://github.com/jwds1978/jwds1978.github.io.